Adopting Grace and Grit and the Family of Faith

“In love He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, which He freely bestowed on us in the Beloved” (Ephesians 1:5-6 NASB). Blessed be God the Father who chose us before we knew Him (v. 3-4), gave us grace and saving faith as a gift (2:8-9), and in His Beloved Son brought us near who were far off (2:13). We who by birth were “foreigners” are now family members in God’s house (2:19). Preaching through those passages years ago changed my life and understanding of my Father’s adoption, and it changed our family as we adopted Matteus.

November is National Adoption Month and a great time to reflect on God’s adopting grace of believers and the grace needed in human adoption and its significant challenges and struggles (more on that farther down). Our church is blessed to have at least 13 among us who came into their families by adoption, and at least 2-3 other adults who adopted and raised children now outside their home and church. 

James 1:27 says true religion includes caring for orphans and widows in their difficulty, and true faith seeks to meet the needs of those who lack (James 2:15-17). Jesus said what we do or don’t do for the least of His children (clothing, meeting needs, welcoming, etc.) we do unto Him (Matthew 25:35-45). As we approach the holidays, it’s good to think of practical ways we can care for and connect with or invite over widows among us or others who may or may not have family near, and ways we can care for the fatherless in our community (Pregnancy Counseling Services Health in Placerville is one great local organization that offers clothing and needs for little ones that are often fatherless). For our members wanting to reach out to widows or homebound over the holidays, please contact us for a list.

The orphan crisis globally is in the tens of millions. I am on the board for the gospel- centered Compassion for Congo ministry that this week is taking in 5-9 very sickly and needy children with no parents from a war-torn village. They will become part of the household and orphanage of Didier and this wonderful ministry our church supports, and if you’d like to be a part of sponsoring or supporting one of these children one-time or monthly, you can visit www.gcb.church/congo or contact Pastor Phil for more info. Next month will be an opportunity to give to provide shoes for Christmas for over 300 children that we’ll share more about then. 

This month of Adoption Awareness is also a good time to acknowledge there are also great needs and opportunities for our church to continue to care for former orphans among us and their parents. James 1:27 mentions their "distress" or "affliction," and the impact of that in early years can affect many years to come. Long after the adoption there are often struggles and special needs and unseen needs of these precious “children from hard places.” Adoptive families need church families who will support and pray and come alongside them and encourage kids and parents. An adoptive parent shared with me "being transparent with our struggles as parents and need for prayer and wisdom ... I have found that most people are shocked and very taken aback at some of the things [an adopted child has] been through or stuggled with ... events and traumas ... that have caused so many heartaches and challenges in their daily lives! ... adoptive families in our church have some very unique and difficult struggles that can be so overwhelming ... others may not "understand" or make quick judgments about the way we parent ... or just not understand the circumstances that impact the way our kids respond or react." 

Pastor Phil's plea: please take the time to listen to this class we recorded a few years ago to help open eyes and hearts of the church and children’s workers to better understand, love and know how to pray for these families within your family of faith: 

Adoption Class #23: Church and Children's Ministry Support - Sensory Issues & Autism 

Please also read the below PDF handout for ways the church can support and help (as well as what doesn't help) and observations many parents in our midst resonate with:

Microsoft Word - 24 - Safe Church FINAL CLASS

Lastly, below are the resources I put together a few years ago for an even larger group of adoptive families that were at our church at the time. The first 2 pages of the syllabus give more of my perspective and personal journey in this. Some of the audio links include testimonials from parents in our church as well as insights from other pastors who have adopted, such as my friend Brian Borgman (author of After They Are Yours: The Grace and Grit of Adoption), John Piper, Voddie Baucham, Paul Tripp, etc.

Adoption Parenting Class | Gold Country Baptist Church 

Let’s be a church family that cares well for all families these holidays and for any lonely over the holidays (widow or otherwise) let’s welcome more into our families as the family of Christ.